And So It Begins...

For those of you who don't know me well, I am not really much of a morning person.  I mean by the time most people actually see me in the morning, I am just fine. Energetic and smiling actually.  But that's after I've hit "snooze" on my alarm about 6 times, have had my cup of coffee, listened to some music to pump me up, and have made about 3 "to do" lists.  Last night as I drifted off to sleep, I prayed that I would wake up right on time this morning, at 5:30am.  I asked for energy, strength, and excitement to just pull me out of bed BEFORE or as my 5:30am alarm was going off.  I think I've only woken up before my alarm about seven times in my entire life time, however at 5:28am today my prayers were answered. Even Mr. Fadeji was graced by my presence this morning as he agreed that he was witnessing a straight up miracle. 

And here I am, early morning on a Monday, super excited to start back to work.  Since my school is on a year round schedule, we have a pretty short summer (I know, poor us...) which means that today, I start back to work, next Monday, our staff starts back to work and Wednesday, our hallways and classrooms will once again be filled with the wonder of children's voices, laughter, and love. 

I've wanted to blog almost all "summer" but like with everything, we all need a break now and then and I decided to practice what I preach by slowing down and giving myself enough down time over the past two weeks to relax and rejuvenate.  After doing the dishes this morning and throwing a load of laundry in the washing machine from our weekend getaway with my family up to Tahoe (6 hour drive home yesterday - solid), I opted for a quick work sesh on my laptop.  And then I saw my neat little stash of goodies waiting for me on the dining room table. 

The book: Yes, I finally read Mindset by Carol Dweck this summer.  Although I was already familiar with the "fixed mindset" and the "growth mindset" through other avenues, it served as a great reminder for how I want to lead.  It made me want to coach the many people I work with and care about into working towards a growth mindset and also challenged my thinking about how to help students become aware of this mindset.  This year, I hope to tackle the "right kind of praise" with my staff. I hope I never hear, "You're so smart" again, but I will, and we will all learn together. Seeing this book reminded me that, I can and should read more often.

The coffee: Well let's just be serious, nothing would have gotten done this morning without that. 

The laptop: It's not the laptop I noticed, although the teal cover is one of my favorite principal accessories, but instead, it's the two cards on top of my laptop.  Unfortunately, those are sympathy cards that I needed to write. It was a summer of loss for many people, and honestly, there are always people around us experiencing a season of loss.  The cards reminded me to never be too busy to stop, take time, and write a note. They also reminded me that so often, we have no clue what those around us are going through.  Yes, we all know this - but do we change our behaviors because of it? We should. Each day this coming year, I hope to be more caring, more compassionate, and more forgiving. 

The nail polish: This summer, I was out to coffee with an educator whom I admire deeply.  This woman honestly models a lot of things for me that I treasure daily. As we were sipping our lattes, talking about real world issues, I couldn't help but be distracted by her perfect, red, gel manicure. And that's when I told myself, this year - I was going to be a little more polished than in the past. Both personally and professionally.  So today, before I step back into work, you can bet your bottom dollar that this girl will have a brand spankin' new coat of "Dream On" and "Taupeless Beach" to serve as a reminder that we all could use a little polishing now and then.

Hot pink post-it notes: You should see what my office looks like.

The dying plant in the background: I almost moved this plant because at first, I thought it made the picture look really tacky but then I laughed (yes, out loud in my kitchen, alone at 5:49am) because it represents something really important and worth remembering.  First of all, I clearly cannot take care of any plant.  My office staff knows that if they don't take care of the plants in our office, they will die immediately. I thought SURELY that at home this "summer" I could handle ONE plant right?! WRONG. This plant represents something really powerful for me. I am not good at taking care of plants.  In fact, there are many things I'm not good at but part of knowing myself is to find my strengths, use them and then draw on the strengths of those around me to make a dynamic team.  On the surface level, we all know things we are good at and things we aren't. However, this year, I hope to dig a little deeper and really identify my weaknesses, my strengths and to make time to coach those around me to do the same.  Can you imagine?  I'm super excited for this venture and I can hardly wait to start reading Strengths Finder by Tom Rath.  (given to me by the mysterious lady with the amazing red nails) 

And there you have it - I'm back at it. Back to school, back to blogging, back to "work" where I find great joy on a daily basis. Back to being in classrooms as much as I possibly can. Back to four square games with seven year olds. Back to trying my best to make sure my staff knows how much I value and appreciate them. Back to late nights and early mornings. Back to all of it. 2014-15 watch out.....it's going to be a magical year.

Student Teachers, Full Calendars & Closed Doors

I remember my very first staff meeting as the new principal at Penngrove.  We were brainstorming our "hopes and dreams" for the year and I was writing as quickly as I could smiling along the way as staff members called out various topics, scenarios, and ideas.  I remember a teacher earnestly sharing that she would really love to see student teachers return to the Penngrove campus.  This teacher shared with the group that at one point in time, there had been many student teachers at Penngrove but due to university supervisors wanting more "concentrated sites," Penngrove had lost connection with the nearby colleges.  I couldn't help but notice the many heads nodding in agreement as this teacher shared the value of having student teachers in the classroom and around campus and I thought to myself, "Easy! That's a quick fix!" Later that week, I made a couple phone calls to Sonoma State and Dominican University, took a deep breath, and hoped for the best.

Twenty-two months later, we have to practically turn student teachers away from our campus.  Currently, we have nine student teachers at Penngrove and last Tuesday, I had the privilege and honor of meeting with four new incoming student teachers for Fall 2014. Let me back up for a quick second. I have to admit that when I glanced at my Tuesday calendar and saw "meet w/ student teacher advisor from SSU" for an HOUR and a HALF, I thought that Nicole, my invaluable office manager, must have made a typo.  What could I possibly have to talk to the SSU advisor about for that length of time?!  It probably didn't help that by 10am, I was on the verge of tears due to a number of circumstances beyond my control including finding out some really heartbreaking news about several of my students. Most days, I find myself being so strong for our students, for our staff, for our community.  But there are days where I could almost crumple to the ground in a sob when certain things come to light in unfortunate ways. Back to the meeting. 

So here I was, meeting with Jane, the SSU student teacher advisor.  Jane confirmed that we were indeed meeting for an hour and a half.  15 minutes to prep, an hour to interview/get to know the new student teachers, and 15 minutes to debrief.  I tried to not look too disappointed or irritated but then I decided to just come clean with Jane.  Jane is a retired principal so she totally "gets" it.  She knows that feeling when the pull of needing to be in 10 places at once weighs you down. Jane "gets" that long meetings and returning phone calls aren't always at the top of the priority list, and she certainly "gets" that student teachers can take up a lot of time and energy that isn't always easy. I took a couple of honest moments with Jane, venting about my morning, asking her to excuse my disheveled behavior and letting her overhear me beg Nicole to order a latte and a breakfast sandwich from down the street.  

And there they were. Four bright-eyed, youthful faces with eager spirits and smiles that would light up even the darkest of rooms.  As I invited them into my office, Jane and I welcomed them one by one.  We sat around my conference table sharing and learning about one another.  I learned that Daniela enjoys creative writing.  She has worked at quite a few schools but she wants more experience with creating lesson plans and classroom management.  I discovered that Jayme is an animal lover who attended Penngrove as an elementary student! I listened intently as Jeff shared with us that teaching runs in his family and despite his attempt so curb his interests in teaching, he was finally succumbing to his strong desire to inspire curiosity in his students, which he feels is the key to happiness.  I heard Katie share about her love for music and traveling, yet admit that she needs to gain the confidence to know that she IS a real adult now.  

As I sat there listening to these student teachers, it took all of my strength to fight back the tears that had tried so hard to escape earlier that morning.  I couldn't help but to see right into their hearts. I couldn't help but to feel the honest and genuine excitement that they possessed just to be able to work with students.  I sat there feeling so incredibly fortunate to be the principal of a school where we value student teachers.  A school where we want to soak up that youthful desire to inspire and generate curiosity in students.  And how lucky am I to have SO many talented, dedicated, loving teachers who are willing to be mentor teachers to this new generation of educators? After Daniela, Jayme, Jeff, and Katie left my office, Jane and I discussed where we thought each student teacher would flourish. We placed each of them in a wonderful "home" and Jane and I parted ways.  

And then I did something I don't do often enough. I closed and locked my office door. I sat at my desk with my eyes closed, and I reflected for just a quiet minute or two.  I reminded myself that each and every meeting on my calendar has the ability to be impactful and powerful in its own way.  I allowed myself to feel guilty for having a bad attitude about the hour and a half meeting.  I forgave myself for scarfing down a breakfast sandwich in front of these young, impressionable minds.  And I let a single tear fall. A tear that represented heartache, grief, and challenge.  And then the second and final tear. The tear that represented new life, gratitude, excitement, devotion, vulnerability, and joy.